A few years ago, there was a guy in my life. I won’t go into the boring (and ultimately irrelevant) details of what happened, but suffice to say he was not a good guy. It took me a while to realise that, though, as he had enough charm and wit to get under my skin, and also had the same effect on two close friends. He was quite manipulative and in the end, he had managed to play us all against each other, even resulting in a rift in our friendship. He didn’t care that he was hurting us; on the contrary, he actually seemed to get enjoyment from toying with our lives and emotions. We all worked in the same company so it was a very difficult time, with every day bringing new arguments and feelings of resentment, anger, and hurt. Even after I cut off contact with him, I couldn’t get the situation out of my mind. Every time I saw him in the office, strong feelings of bitterness and hatred would rise up, spoil my mood, and ruin my day.
A Big Confession
Once again I’ve come with promises, and once again I’ve left you high and dry. Months have passed since my last post and my voice on this page remains silent.
The truth is, I’ve been struggling.
The other day I was sitting on the beach here on Koh Lanta, my home away from home again this winter, watching this serenely beautiful sunset. I was thinking about someone, a person in my life whom I have come to love beyond measure.
Well, 2016 has been a real humdinger of a year, amiright?!
On a global level, it has sometimes felt like the world is collapsing around us. We’ve lost so many incredible artists and global icons. We’ve witnessed political calamities unfolding like Brexit and the election of Trump. In public commentary, behaviour and voting patterns we’ve seen an unfortunate rise in anti-“outsider” sentiment and blatant racism. Terrorist attacks continue to inspire fear and sorrow around the world, and our hearts have broken wide open upon seeing the ongoing atrocities and slaughter in war-torn Syria.
On a personal level, 2016 was really a year of two halves.
About four months ago, my Mum noticed that my Dad had been a bit absent-minded – more than usual, anyway. Asking what day it was, ignoring a leaky kitchen ceiling for a few days, forgetting to play golf one day. That was the real warning sign right there – my Dad’s life pretty much revolved around golf, so for him to forget to play was simply unthinkable.
After several days of trying to convince him to go to a doctor (he was a stubborn man), he finally relented and allowed my Mum and my brother to bring him to the hospital. He was admitted immediately and was eventually diagnosed with a brain tumour. They thought it would be treatable, and Dad, our “Indestructible Man”, had bounced back from a number of health issues before, so, while concerned, we remained positive and didn’t necessarily fear the worst. Delays in getting the biopsy completed meant that it was another few weeks before we finally got the news every family dreads – the tumour was in fact an aggressive and terminal form of brain cancer. We were told he had months left. As it turned out, he only lasted another two weeks.
When it comes to spiritual (or self-improvement) practice, everyone has different preferences. Some like meditation, some prefer yoga, some do mindfulness practices, some talk to angels… I think that all practices can ultimately connect you to the same energy that lies within and around us, so it doesn’t really matter which particular practice resonates with you. There is no right or wrong.
With one caveat…
Spiritual practice should be a DAILY thing. Not every few days, or every once in a while. EVERY DAY.
Imagine having a conversation like this with a friend:
“Hey buddy! Thanks so much!”
“That 100 quid!”
“Ummm… what 100 quid?”
“The 100 quid you’re going to give me!”
“What, you need a loan?”
“Haha! No, not a loan, you’re just gonna give it to me!”
“Ehhh are you crazy? I can barely afford to splash out 100 quid on myself, let alone just give it away!”
Sounds about right, yeah? After all, it would be a bit presumptuous to just assume someone is just going to give you something for nothing.
Well here’s the good news – the Universe LOVES presumption!
You can be happy, right here, right now.
It is possible to summon a feeling of joy in every single moment, no matter where you are or what you’re doing.
And if it is possible to consciously create a joyful moment, doesn’t it then follow that you can bring that practice that to every moment and create a joyful life?
Yes, it does! Keep reading to find out how.
As my time in Ko Lanta draws to close (for now at least), I realised I’ve been holding back a bit from you guys. I’ve talked a little bit before about how difficult it can be to really open up and put myself out there publicly through a blog. This is a continual work in progress for me, not just on this site but on social media too. I’m generally always lurking around in the background but have never been one to post every step of my daily life online. I’m more a once-a-month than a once-a-day kinda gal. This is definitely on my “needs improvement” list, but right now it means that I haven’t shown you nearly enough of just how idyllic life on this island is.
From my last post you might be forgiven for thinking that life on Lanta is a never-ending party. Well I guess you wouldn’t be entirely wrong; there is always a party to go to with fantastic people if and when you’re in the mood. However, my most profound and rewarding moments on this beautiful island have come when I have withdrawn from the crowd to sit with my Self and embrace the serenity of solitude.